Quote Watchmen

Ozymandias/Adrian Veidt
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"Do it? Dan, I'm not a republic serial villain. Do you seriously think I'd explain my master-stroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I activated it 35 minute minutes ago"

"An intractable problem can only be resolved by stepping beyond conventional solutions"

"I saved earth from hell. Next, I'll help her towards utopia. It is as Rameses said: 'Canaan is devastated, Ashkellon is fallen, Gezer is ruined, Venoam is reduced to nothing"

"I don't mind being the smartest man in the world. I just wish it wasn't this one"

"A world at peace. There had to be sacrifice"

"It doesn't take a genius to see the world has problems"

The Comedian/Edward Blake
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"Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense"

"Yeah. Yeah, that's right. Pregnant woman. Gunned her down. Bang. And y'know what? You watched me. You coulda changed the gun into steam or the bullets into mercury or the bottle into snowflakes! You coulda teleported either of us to goddamn Australia... but you didn't lift a finger! You don't really give a damn about human beings. I've watched you. You never cared about whats-her-name, Janey Slater, even before you ditched her. Soon you won't be interested in Sally Jupiter's little girl, either. You're driftin' outta touch, Doc. You're turning into a flake. God help us all"

"It doesn't matter squat because inside thirty years the nukes are gonna be flying like maybugs... and then Ozzy here is gonna be the smartest man on the cinder. Now, pardon me, but I got an appointment. See you in the funny papers"

"Just don't ask me where I was when I heard about J.F.K"

Nite Owl II/Daniel Dreiberg
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"It's all crap. Who needs all this hardware to catch hookers and purse-snatchers?"

"Y'know, this must be how ordinary people feel. This must be how ordinary people feel around us"

"Who the hell do you think you are!? You live off people while insulting them, nobody complains because they think you're a goddamn lunatic! Do you know how hard it is being your friend?"

"We were supposed to make the world a better place"

"Us retired guys have to stick together"

Dr. Manhattan/Jon Osterman
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"I've walked across the sun. I've seen events so tiny and so fast they can hardly be said to have occurred at all, but you... you are a man. To me, the world's smartest man poses no more a threat than its smartest termite"

"The existence of life is a highly overrated phenomenon"

"They call me Doctor Manhattan. They explain the name has been chosen for the ominous associations it will raise in America's enemies. They are shaping me into something gaudy. Something lethal"

"We're all puppets, Laurie. I'm just a puppet who can see the strings"

"There is no future. There is no past. Do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.

"She says I am like a god now, I tell her I don't think there is a god, and if there is I'm nothing like him"

"I can change almost anything... but I can't change human nature"

"When you left me, I left Earth. Does that not show I care?"

Silk Spectre II/Laurie Juspeczyk
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"Oh shit. I'm on Mars"

"Your finger is like licking a battery"

"I'm used to going out at 3AM and doing something stupid"

"Jon understands a lot of things. But he doesn't understand me"

"People do strange things, their lives take them strange places, and sometimes you can't talk about them. I know how that is"

Rorschach/Walter Kovacs
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"Rorschach's journal. October 12th, 1985. Dog carcass in alley this morning, tire tread on burst stomach. This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians of the word will look up and shout 'Save us!' and will look down and whisper... 'No'. They had a choice, all of them. They could've followed in the footsteps of good men like my father, or President Truman. Decent men, those who believe a day's work for a day's pay. Instead they follow the droppings of lechers and communists and didn't realize that the trail led over a precipice until it was too late. Don't tell me they didn't have a choice. Now the whole world stands on the brink, starring down into bloody hell, all those liberals and intellectuals and smooth-talkers, and all of the sudden nobody can think of anything to say"

"This city is dying of rabies. I the best I can do to wipe away random flecks of foam from its lips?"

"Beneath me, this awful city, it screams like an abattoir full of retarded children. New York. Somebody knows why. Down there... somebody knows. The dusk reeks of fornication and ban consciences. I believe I shall take my exercise"

"On Friday night, a comedian died in New York. Somebody threw him out a window and when he hit the sidewalk his head was driven up into his stomach. Nobody cares. Nobody cares but me"

"Soon there will be war. Millions will burn. Millions will perish in sickness and misery. Why does one death matter against so many? There is good and there is evil, and evil must be punished. Even in the face of Armageddon, I shall not compromise this. But there are so many deserving of retribution and there is so little time"

"Heard joke once: Man goes to see doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain. Doctor says 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up'. Man starts crying and says, 'But doctor, I am Pagliacci'. Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains"

"None of you understand. I'm not locked up in here with you, YOU'RE LOCKED IN HERE WITH ME!"

"Give me the smallest finger of man's hand and I'll produce information. This face. No computer necessary"

"Don't worry. Won't insult legendary underworld solidarity by suggesting you surrender name without torture"

"Gun. No license. I checked. Very bad"

"By the way, you need a stronger lock. That new one broke after one shove"

"Roschach's Journal. Novermber 1st, 1985. Final entry. Left Veidt's office just before midnight.  Dreiberg convinced Veidt's behind everything. He's serious about visitng Antartica. Owlship capable apparently. But are we? Veidt. Cannot imangine more dangerous opponent. He could kill us both. There in the snow, nobody would ever know. Veidt is faster than Dreiberg. Pehaps faster than me. Return from mission seems unlikely. This last entry. Will shortly mail journal to only people can trust. Tell Dreiberg need to check maildrop. He believes me. If reading this now, whether I'm alive or dead, you will know the truth. Whatever precise nature of this conspiracy, Adrian Veidt responsible. Have done best to make this legible. Believe it paints disturbing picture. Appreciate recent support and hope world survives long enough for this to reach you, but tanks are in East Berlin, and writing is on wall. For my own part, regret nothing. Have lived life, free from compromise... and step into the shadow now without complaint"

Dialog
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"Maybe this was a political killing"
"Maybe. Or maybe somebody's picking off costumed heroes"
"Um. Don't you think that's a little paranoid?"
"That's what they're saying about me now? That I'm paranoid? The Comedian was active for 40 years. Made a lot enemies in that time. How's your friend, Hollis Mason these days?"
"Hollis? What does he..."
"They were both Minutemen when Blake was 16 and Mason was the first Nite Owl. That book Mason wrote. He said some bad things about The Comedian in it"
"Rorschach. I don't like what you're implying here. Hollis is an old man, If you're thinking about going over there and scaring him..."
"Implying nothing. Just an observation. Anyway, though I'd let you know. In case somebody's gunning for masks. Better go now. Things to do"
"Yeah, well, the tunnel brings you out in a warehouse two blocks north"
"Yes, I remember. Used to come here often when we were partners"
"Oh. Uh, yeah... yeah. Those were great times, Rorschach. Great times. Whatever happened to them?"
"You Quit"
-Nite Owl II and Rorschach

"The Comedian had plenty of other political enemies to choose from, discounting the Russians. The man was practically a Nazi"
"He stood up for his country, Veidt. Never let anyone retire him. Never cashed in on his reputation. Never set up a company selling posters and diet books and toy soldiers based on himself. Never became a prostitute. If that makes him a Nazi, you might as well call me a Nazi, too"
-Ozymandias and Rorschach

"I think you take this vigilante stuff too seriously. Since the Keen Act was passed in '77 only the government-sponsored weirdos are active. They don't interfere"
"Screw them! What about Rorschach? Rorschach never retired, even after him and his buddies fell out of grace. Rorschach's still out there somewhere. He's crazier than a snake's armpit and wanted on two counts of murder one. We got a cozy little homicide here. If he gets involved, we'll be up to our butts in corpses"
-Police Detective and Detective Steve Fine

"Gloves. Hats. Shoes. There, think that's everything we...
"Oh God! I- it's... oh , God... what are you doing here?"
"Ms. Shairp. Long time no see. Told press I made sexual advances towards you. Not true. Very bad.
"No! I never said that! I got misquoted! Oh, God! Please don't...
"Rorschach? Come on, man... leave it"
"Can't. Slur on reputation. Serious business. How much did they pay you to lie about me, whore?
"Oh please, don't say that. Not in front of my kids... they don't know.
[pause, Rorschach looks at one of Ms. Shairp's frightened children]
"Got what we came for. Finished here now. Let's go"
-Rorschach, Ms Shairp and Nite Owl II

"Hey you remember that guy? The one who pretended to be a super villain so be could get beaten up?"
"Oh, you mean Captain Carnage. Ha ha ha! He was one for the books"
"You're telling me! I remember, I caught him coming out of a jeweler's. I didn't know what his racket was. I start hitting him and I'm thin 'Jeez, he's breathing funny. Does he have asthma?'"
"Ha ha ha. He tried that with me, only, I'd heard of him, so I just walked away. He follows me down the street... broad daylight, right? He's saying 'PUNISH ME!' I'm saying 'No! Get lost!'"
"Ha ha ha. Whatever happened to him?"
"Oh, he pulled it on Rorschach... and Rorschach dropped him down an elevator shaft"
[akward pause]
"PHAAA HA HA HA! oh, God! I'm sorry, that isn't funny, Ha ha ha ha ha!"
"Ha ha ha! I guess it's not... it is a little funny. Ha ha ha!"
"Ahuh. Ahuhuhuh... jeez, y'know, that felt good. There doesn't seem to be that many laughs around these days"
"Well what did you expect? The Comedian's Dead"
-Silk Spectre II and Nite Owl II

"Maragrita?"
"Mother it's 2'o'clock in theafternoon"
"Why do you always call me mother when your mad? I know why you're here. I still read, you know. Saw it in the paper. Eddie Blake's funeral is today. Finally got his punch line, I guess. Poor Eddie"
"'Poor Eddie', after what he did to you!?"
"Laurie, you're still young. You don't know. What happened happened 40 years ago. I'm 67 years old. Every day, the future gets a little darker. But the past, even the grimy parts, keep on getting brighter"
-Silk Spectre I/Sally Jupiter and Silk Spectre II

"Watchmen. That's the real joke. It didn't work 15 years ago, it sure as hell ain't gonna work now just because you wanna keep playing cowboys and indians"
"Maybe we should agree on no drinking at meetings? [The Comedian laughes] Look, Rorschach and I have been able to make real headway on the gang problem by working together"
"Group this size, seems like a publicity stunt. Not in it for the ink"
"We can do so much more. We can save this world. [The Comedian snickers] With the right leadership"
"And that be you, right Ozzy? Hell, you're the smartest man on the planet"
"It doesn't take a genius to see the world has problems"
"Yeah, but it takes a room full of morons to think they're small enough for you to handle. You know, mankind's been trying to kill eachother off since the beginning of time. Now, we finally have the power to finish the job. Ain't nothing's going to matter once those nukes starting flying, we'll all be dust. And Ozymandias here, we'll be the smartest man on the cinder"
-The Comedian, Nite Owl II, Rorschach and Ozymandias

"Hello, Rorschach. How are you today?"
"In prison. Yourself?"
-Dr. Malcom Long and Rorschach

"Walter, is what happened to Kitty Genovese really proof that the whole of mankind is rotten? I think you've been conditioned with a negative view. There are good people, too, like...
"Like you?"
"Me? Oh, well, I wouldn't say that. I...
"No. You just think it. Think you're 'good people'. Why are you spending so much time with me. Doctor?
"Uh... well, because I care about you, and because I want to make you well...
"Other people, down in cells. Behavior more extreme then mine. You don't spend anytime with them... but then, they're not famous. Won't get your name in the journals. You don't want to make me well. Just want to know what makes me sick. You'll find out. Have patience doctor, you'll find out"
-Dr. Malcom Long and Rorschach

"You sound bitter. You're a strange man, Blake. You have strange attitudes towards to life and war"
"Strange? Listen... once you figure what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense"
"The charred villages, the boys with necklaces of human ears... these are part of the joke?"
"Hey... I never said it was a good joke! I'm just playing along with the gag"
-Dr. Manhattan and The Comedian

"Is that what you are? The most powerful thing in the universe and you're just a puppet following a script?"
"We're all puppets, Laurie. I'm just a puppet who can see the strings"
-Silk Spectre II and Dr. Manhattan

"Look, I just meant we took enough unnecessary risks retrieving your outfit this morning..."
"Unnecessary? Cowering down here in sludge and pollution, conjuring names on screens, learning nothing: that is unnecessary. Give me smallest finger on man's hand. I'll produce information. Computer unnecessary. This face, all that's necessary... all I need"
-Nite Owl II and Rorschach

"But the country's disintegrating. What's happened to America? What's happened to the American dream?
"It came true! You're looking at it. Now c'mon... lets really put these jokers through some changes"
-Nite Owl II and The Comedian

[A prison riot has started because of Rorschach]
"We wanna piece of him, Big Figure!"
"Sure. Thanksgiving's early this year, but everyone gets a piece. Its just I get to carve. So beat it"
-Prison Inmate and Big Figure

"There. Did what had to be done. Can leave now"
"Really? Are you sure? We don't want to get too reckless and go diving headifrst into things!"
[Rorschach just drowned Big Figure]
"Hurm. Good advice. Sure there were many who would agree with you"
-Rorschach and Silk Spectre II

"Goddamn, I love working on American soil, Dan. Ain't had this much fun since Woodward and Bernstein"
"How long can we keep this up?"
"Congress is pushing through some new bill that's gonna outlaw masks. Our days are numbered. Till then, it's like you always say; We're society's only protection"
"From what?"
"You kidding me? From themselves"
-The Comedian and Nite Owl II

"Thermodynamic miracles... events with odds against so astronomical they're effectively impossible, like oxygen spontaneously becoming gold. I long to observe such a thing. And yet, in each human coupling, a thousand million sperm vie for a single egg. Multiply those odds by countless generations, against the odds of your ancestors being alive; meeting; siring this precise son; that exact daughter... Until your mother loves a man she has every reason to hate, and of that union, of the thousand million children competing for fertilization, it was you, only you, that emerged. To distill so specific a form from that chaos of improbability, like turning air to gold... that is the crowning unlikelihood. The thermodynamic miracle"
"But... if me, my birth, if that's a thermodynamic miracle... I mean, you could say that about anybody in the world!"
"Yes. Anybody in the world... But the world is so full of people, so crowded with these miracles that they become commonplace and we forget... I forget. We gaze continually at the world and it grows dull in our perceptions. Yet seen from another's vantage point, as if new, it may still take our breath away. Come... dry your eyes. For you are life, rarer than a quark and unpredictable beyond the dreams of Heisenberg; the clay in which the forces that shape all things leave their fingerprints most clearly. Dry your eyes... and let's go home"
-Dr. Manhattan and Silk Spectre II

"Jon... I know people think me callous, but I've made myself feel every death. By day, I imagine endless faces. By night... well, I dream, about swimming towards a hideous... no. Never mind. It isn't significant. What's significant is that I know. I know I've struggled across the backs of murdered innocents to save humanity... but someone had to take the weight of that awful, necessary crime. I'd hoped you'd understand, unlike Rorschach"
"You needn't consider Rorschach. I strongly doubt he'll reach civilization. ...But yes, I understand, without condoning or condemning. Human affairs cannot be my concern. I'm leaving this galaxy for one less complicated"
"But you'd regained interest in human life"
"Yes, I have. I think perhaps I'll create some. Goodbye, Adrian"
"Jon, wait, before you leave... I did the right thing, didn't I? It all worked out in the end"
""In the end?" Nothing ends, Adrian. Nothing ever ends"
"Jon? Wait! What do you mean by... [Manhattan dissapears, leaving a conflicted Adrian comptemplating his words]
-Ozymandias and Dr. Manhattan

"Where are you going?"
"Back to owlship. Back to America. Evil must be punished. People must be told"
"Rorschach... you know I can't let you do that"
"Huhhh... of course. Must protect Veidt's new utopia. One more body amongst foundations makes little difference. Well? What are you waiting for? Do it"
"Rorchach..."
"DO IT!"
-Dr. Manhattan and Rorschach